The Road Not Taken
Monday, March 20th, 2006Idle minds are the ultimate life simulators. Want proof? Visit my brain while it’s idle, and you’ll see strange new worlds where, usually, I’m stronger, faster, and cooler than Superman. If I’m not making up worlds where everyone eerily lives in harmony and peace, I would be rewritting the history of my life by reenacting specific moments in my life as if I had knowledge of the future. For example, if I had known that I would be fat, I would have learned to excercise more. Stuff like that. One moment in my life stood the test of time and continues to generate interest for my idle mind. Here’s the setup.
When I was in SFSU, I decided to work at the bookstore. Incredibly boring job as I would later find out is true for all retail work. Anyways, the bookstore accepts all major forms of credit cards except Discover card. Well one time this one customer was trying to buy a whole slew of books, just like everyone else in line, and all she had was a credit card her parents gave her to use. Yup, you guessed it, it was a Discover card. I see this happen from time to time. Everytime they simply dismissed it and simply produce another card. This time, it was different. She asked her friend who was there with her at the time if maybe she can help pay, but she said she couldn’t help. She mentioned that she absolutely needed those books for her class the next day. I simply stood there and watched. Eventually she did the only thing she can do. Cancel the purchase and left.
While they were debating what to do about this little unwelcomed serendipity, I was debating whether I should help her or not. At the time, I had my wallet on my with a bank card that can most certainly help her. I stood there and thought and thought and thought and thought about just lending her the money for the books. I was stuck. I wanted to help her, but I didn’t trust them. Even after they left, I still couldn’t decide even though it doesn’t matter anymore. I really wanted to help them, but I was afraid. To this day, I am absolutely curious as to what would happened had I decided to help them. I know of at least 3 possible outcomes. You can probably tell which one is my favorite.
1. It was all a scam. They do this with a whole slew of other lonely cashiers and see which one will take the bait. I became an unfortunate victim of the day, and before I know it, my savings were drained to the last dollar. I regreted it for the rest of my life and eventually live on the streets begging for quarters from strangers. One day, the same two girls will see me, point, and laugh at my apparent naive stupidity. I eventually die from pneumonia and am buried with a tombstone that simply says "John Doe." All this just because I decided to trust the generosity in my heart.
2. Nothing happened. I lent them the money. They paid me back. End of story.
3. Everything happened. I lent her the money which makes her notice me and fall head over heels over my unselfish guesture. Suddenly, I am beautiful to her eyes. She and I would start seeing each other which would lead to love. We’d then get married, have kids, and just live the rest of our lives knowing that we have accomplished the greatest personal goal anyone could ever dreamed of. We found someone to grow old with. All this just because I decided to trust the generosity in my heart.
I told this same story to two good friends of mine, and without a moment’s hesitation they forsee the first outcome. It saddens me that we don’t live in a society that at the very least see the second outcome first. I’m more than aware of the dangers of putting too much trust to complete strangers. It’s just that it feels like we’ve lost the war. You know it. The one where we can believe the words of a complete stranger simply because we know that they’re a human being. We fought this war against the con men of the ages, and repeatedly we lost to them. Now they’ve won, and we are simply living out our lifes with defeat written in our hearts and minds.
